"Where did the time go?"

I know it’s a cliché when people say, “Where did the time go?” I never thought I would be saying that after having my daughter scream for the first year of her life. Frankly, at her first birthday I felt like she should have been 16 years old. I’m not quite sure what happened that second and third year. I believe one of the years we had a hurricane, I was almost 8 months pregnant and we were without power for 4 days while we all huddled in bed to retain body heat (including my 90lb German Shepherd) –that, I remember. But her getting older –That I don’t.

When you’re home every day by yourself with one or multiple kids, you tend to be in survival mode and robotically go through the day, meeting everyone’s demands. You don’t really have the time to sit and breathe it all in. In the moment, life seems to stand still (when you’re cleaning, feeding, doing laundry, etc), but when you look back, you can’t imagine how much has passed.

She has changed so much. She yearns for space and has her own separate wants and needs. Her main personality still holds strong –a feisty, outspoken, kindhearted, opinionated, tom-boy, joke-telling preschooler. But it seems like yesterday, she was this helpless little baby who eventually transformed into a well-spoken, more independent, big sister.

She no longer needs me for frivolous things, so I take every opportunity I can with her - When I carry my daughter, not because she needs me to, but because she wants me to, I notice how heavy she has become, how articulate her words are spoken, and how her once shorten legs now dangle past my thighs -I hold onto this moment for all eternity, I breathe it in, because I know in another year I’ll say, “Where did the time go?”