An illness strikes with a vengeance

I'd like to think it's our outdoor lifestyle and lack of processed foods that keeps our family healthy and strong. But, even with the best of diets and overload of fresh air, every now and then, we all succumb to an illness. This past weekend/early week, a stomach virus ripped through our home with a vengeance. Every one of us was laid up and hunkered down in my king sized bed, wishing the days away. But, thank goodness for kindles and recorded DVR shows and family, to get us through the duration. Now that my daughter is back in school, my husband is back at work, and I sit at home staring bleakly at the mounds of laundry and left over cups and plates scattered throughout the house, I want to hop back in this bed and wish the days away all over again...

So much change in such a short time

I awoke this morning with my daughter pouncing on my bed, shrieking, "it's my program day!" Yes, today was her kindergarten end of the year program...

We have been hearing these songs for weeks now and even my son knows most of them by heart. Last night, I felt like it was the first day of school all over again. I sat bedside, stroking her hair, as she asked me what to expect from the show. She asked questions like, would there be a lot of people? Or, what happens if she cried? I answered her various questions the best way I knew how and told her that even if she cried, I would be so proud of all the hard work she put into the show and nothing would disappoint me.

All her family was there waiting, as she walked in the single file line with her classmates into the stuffy gym. Her daddy, brother, myself, my parents (nana and poppy) and my husband's dad and step mother (grandma and grandpa) were all in the front row cheering her on. I sat, almost direct center, with my video camera in hand, as she profusely waved to us. She sung and performed her heart out, without a single tear to be present. I, however, had a few tears when I saw how much she was enjoying herself. She did also occasionally yell out to her brother and wave to us during the show, and I must say, that was the part I loved most.

She closed out the program by saying her name loudly through the microphone and that she liked school and American Ninja Warrior, which one day, I hope plays on her audition tape when she applies to the show.

Upon conclusion, she leaped into my arms and proclaimed her happiness for participating. I hugged her long, dangling body as I kissed her rosy cheeks. The program was over and with it, a piece of my heart. I breathed in the moment... Another milestone has been completed and another chapter ended.

It's hard to imagine kindergarten coming to an end. I feel as if it just begun. I remember her first day jitters and me snuggled up beside her the night before. She wanted me to tell her all about kindergarten and what would her days be like. She had her favorite outfit picked out and already posed in it a few dozen times. She packed and repacked her book bag, making sure everything was just right.

These days passed without warning. Our drop off and pick ups were just a blur of repetitive motions, filled with lots of hugs and kisses. Although, it seemed she never really was ok with being away, but handled it with such grace. Some days, she would hold onto our hug a little longer and walk towards the door with tears in her eyes. And, I would hang back in the parking lot just in case she needed me, with my heart in my hand, shattered into a million pieces. But by the time pick up happened, her face was covered in smiles and she was so eager to tell me about all the fun she had. Then, as I buckled her into her car seat, with her bombarding my ear with story after story, I was able to gently fix all my shattered pieces... 

With just 7 more weeks remaining, I see the wear of the school year on her folder and backpack. Her lunch box has been permanently dyed from various fruits that she left the lids off of. Her Frozen folder has been thickly taped around the edges to keep from fraying. But she never wanted a new one because it was her favorite. The wear on her school materials mimics the wear on my soul. Watching and seeing her go through so many emotions, good and bad, ages me more than time can ever do.

This year was not only an emotional roller coaster with milestones and separations, but also included such growth and maturity. I love seeing how proud she is now that she can read almost everything that her eyes can see. Learning to read has opened a completely new chapter in her life and has transformed the way she previously knew how to play. Play now consists of sitting on her bedroom floor and reading various books to her "pretend" students and leaving me love notes beside my pillow. When I watch all this unfold, I no longer see a baby or toddler, but instead, a little girl with enough sass and courage to take on the world. However underneath, I still see a little girl who will always need her momma, even when she tells me to stop giving her kisses so she could walk inside with her friends.

So much change in such a short time.

But I'm assuming this is what every adult who has raised children is talking about when they say, "enjoy these years because they'll be over in the blink of an eye"... They're talking about these chaotic years, the years where you don't even know what day of the week it is and the years where you spend more time doubting yourself than you ever have. These years, that pass at an alarming rate. These are the years that provide the most change in such a short time frame. 

So many milestones are shoved into the first 0-6 years and it's no wonder parents are so emotional with either trying to hold onto moments or wishing them away...  

But as long as change is happening, it means we're all evolving and moving forward. And as parents, that is what we want for our children. We want them to take the positive messages from school and be strong enough prevail over the daily blunders... When they grow in that direction, it then becomes a little easier for us to slowly release the rope that is tightly wound around and linking our hearts and provide them with more freedom... And that is something to celebrate.

The good old days?

There's an opening quote from a beloved 80's/90's TV show that I love because it speaks true to my soul. It's a staple mark that I try to visualize while family rearing in today's world.

"Whatever happened to predictability. The milkman, the paperboy, evening TV? You miss your old familiar friends, waiting just around the bend..." -Full House

I am a lover of all things vintage and "the good old days" of family dinners around a table, no technology to separate human contact, and a stay at home mom waiting at the doorstep when you arrived through your door. When life was as simple as playing outdoors and riding a bike without a destination in mind. Saying hi to all your neighbors and knowing the entire family generations who lived in the homes around you. When life was just about you and your loved ones, and not about what materialistic objects you can attain. When you didn't feel obligated to "keep up with the Jones."  

I was incredibly lucky to have the opportunity to grow up in a neighborhood in the late 80's/early 90's that still mimicked Andy Griffith's Mayberry. We lived on the same street that my grandmother and mother were born on. My extended family still lived within a few block radius and all the neighbors were the same people my grandmother grew up with. Everyone watched out for other people's children and we ran through random backyards, played baseball, and some wicked games of hide and go seek. I remember stopping many times to help an older person unload their groceries in between my bike riding and I remember a neighbor walking me back home when I fell off my bike. Or our neighbor across the street always had popsicles in their freezer, just in case we wanted some.

These are some of the experiences my children will never have. They'll never know the freedom of not talking on the phone, but just walking or riding a bike to your friends house instead. Playing outdoors blocks away from your home until the street lights turn on. Or the always favorite, leaving your home right after breakfast and not coming back until dinner...

I couldn't imagine even letting my children leave the house without me in their teenage years, let alone my 5 year old daughter playing on the next street without me being present. Not because I'm a hovering parenting (I am that, but that isn't my point), but because it's just not the same world nowadays. 

With all that said, I must say, there are some pros to growing up in this age. While my children won't have the safety freedom of roaming the outdoors and their life is bombarded with technology and everything is telling them to be an adult too soon. In return, they have a more non judgemental world to bask in. In today's world, people are more open and respectful of others in all shapes and sizes (physically, mentally, and emotionally). Something that generations back didn't have. People expected you to be what society thought you should be. Children followed the trades of their parents and every girl aspired to be a mother and a housewife. Women had a role and a place, and now, one is running for president.

This new generation is paving the way for people of all walks of life to be normalized. Mental illness isn't a closed door conversation, the word, Transgender, can be mentioned at the dinner table, and being gay, isn't something to hide  -Unfortunately, I realize this is not like this everywhere, but the fact that it's being covered by major broadcast companies, TV programs, social media, and it's on your TV for the 6:00 news, is a big deal. 

Also, I know when my parent's went to school (1950s), corporal punishment was an everyday thing, even at home. If the teacher hit them, their parent's would too, and the parent didn't even want to hear an explanation or the child's story. Children didn't have a place in society, except to be seen and not heard. So, I must say, I was shocked when I saw that viral post circulating about the child getting paddled in Georgia. I thought we were past that as a whole and I'm flabbergasted that this is still an issue in today's world. It amazes me that children are the only ones you can spank, but in turn, are the most emotionally affected. You can't even hit another adult without proving you were being attacked. But yet, the barbaric message of fear unfortunately still prevails in some parts. 

Here's a random funny story about me attending kindergarten down south in the mid 1980s... I was being dragged down the hall by my teacher towards the principals office to be paddled because I was talking too much (that's not shocking for people who know me in real life). We were from the North, so I had a strong northern accent that they told me to stop using as well (hilarious, I know). Another parent called my parents to notify them what was happening (because obviously, they weren't going to notify them even though my parent's signed the waiver that I wasn't allowed to be paddled). While I waited on the chair for my punishment (hysterically crying), my mom busted through the door (literally), like it was out of a movie. She got in the principal's face and said if you touch my daughter, I'll show up to your house when you least expect it and beat your ass and see how you enjoy it... Needless to say, I was pulled from school that day and we moved back north where kindergarten wasn't mandatory. And I'm grateful that I didn't have that traumatic incident forever branded into my brain cells. But, I feel sorry for the children who's parents didn't go all God Father on the principal. 

See, I was raised in a gentle/peaceful parenting household before it was labeled as such. My parent's always listened to my thoughts and opinions and wanted to hear my side of the story. I was told I could be anything I wanted and they supported me no matter what I did, good or bad.

Thankfully, my children now live in a world where spanking is frowned upon and schools wouldn't even dare to punish a child outside of the home. Parents are becoming more understanding and treating their children with respect. Breastfeeding openly in public is a trending topic and raising kind children to soften the world, instead of toughening children, is no longer mocked. Being a stay at home mom, isn't looked at as laziness and Attachment parenting has become normalized and a widely recognized community. Gentle/peaceful parenting now has a voice and listening and conversing with your children is being heard with open ears. And if you parent "crunchy," people just call you a hippie and they move on with their lives... 

You don't have to fit into category A, B or C anymore. And you're not being bullied into squeezing yourself into category D, E, or F.

While I do love "the good old days" and yearn for a more simplistic lifestyle, I am very fond of the progress we have made as a society. I am happy that our children are growing up in a more liberal light and are allowed to freely express themselves and be who they want to be. But life is all about balance. There is always good with the bad and with that, I will never be on board to "keep up with the Jones" and live my life chasing the dollar. My children understand that happiness comes from within and nothing materialistic you buy will ever replace that happiness. In my home, we will continue to have home cooked dinners around the table, outdoor adventures, and nothing but patience, love, and understanding. I will combine both worlds, old and new, and create a wonderful haven for my children to grow up in. And years from now, when they're talking to their children about their childhood, they'll think of it as, "the good old days."

***As always, thank you for your support. Please pass The Happy Days blog onto your friends and join any of my social media sites to follow along with my story. I post to Instagram almost daily... You can also vote for me on Top Mommy Blogs by clicking the icon on my blog's page. Thank you and enjoy your Happy Days!

Mid Week Humor: Moments of quiet

You know you're a parent when the most exciting part of your day is that quiet few seconds you have when you walk to the driver seat, after buckling your children in their car seats.



**Don't forget to share your parenting humor comments either here, or any of the social media sites I belong to. You can also use the hashtag #thehappydayshumor. I looks forward to reading your experiences and always, thank you for your continued support.

The behind the scenes of a single picture

Today, I posted a photo to my Facebook account that had my daughter in her back carrier labeled, these children will never be too old to be carried. The picture was a momentary peaceful image with both of us full of smiles and displaying utter happiness and content. Like all snapshots do, that only capture a single second in time. However, the picture is not always reality. 

Yes, the reality was, she was full of smiles, but why was she in the carrier in the first place?

Well, it started because we were going to hike through the woods to the nearby pond to throw rocks in the water -like we have done thousands of times. My son eagerly marched his way to the front to lead the way. But my daughter stopped and sat on the ground, not wanting to walk, but to be carried. I'm always up for negotiations within reason and being the peaceful parent that I am, I didn't threaten or punish her for behaving poorly. Hell, I've been known to behave poorly on occasions. I simply pulled out the carrier and we continued with the journey. 

Until the walk back...

Her boots were full of mud and her pants were soppy from playing by the water. Also, her brother wanted to take a spin in the carrier for the walk back. They both started crying and pleading their cases until I decided that no one was going to be carried. Her brother was content to walk as long as someone held his hand and as long as his sister wasn't getting any special treatment. But my spirited 5 year old was not content with my answer. She cried and sobbed like a 15 year old who was just told she couldn't date the quarterback. I walked, she kept up, but not happily. I kept reassuring her she was a big girl and able to make the trek back. I even made several attempts to play games like, 'last one there is a rotten egg' or 'can't catch me'. Although, she wasn't having any of it. Basically, she behaved the way any normal, tired, 5 year old would. 

We arrived back home, my daughter still at my side, now whining, as she continued to say she wanted to be carried. I hugged my little girl and told her how happy I was that she walked by herself. I understood that she was tired and still young enough to not accurately control her emotions like people believe children should. And I also understand that children think differently than adults, they're very linear. She wanted to be held and her brain clouded any rational thinking beyond that. 

My daughter quickly perked up and moved past her meltdown, again, like all children her age do. I didn't find any logic in harping on the incident. I addressed the issue with empathy and showed her lots of love and support, like I always do. At 5 years old, she didn't need a lecture, she needed a hug. And she did, lots of them... 

...And an early bedtime, which was welcomed. 

With social media being one of the biggest revolutions in technology, it's no wonder people base their parenting expectations off of a single picture. People are bombarded daily with lovely, perfect images set out for the world to see. And some of us, ponder how they're done. But what we don't see, is what happened before and after that picture perfect image, because, everything has a story to be told. But just know that reality is also very beautiful, even with the imperfections.



**Remember, you can all follow along with my stories by joining my blog's site or following any of my social media pages. I post pictures and tell stories almost daily on Instagram. Also, you can always vote for me at Top Mommy Blogs by clicking the icon in the right side column. Thank you all for your continued support and I look forward to conversing with you all**

Mid Week Humor: Laundry

The sometimes reality of laundry is when you just replace one dirty pile of clothes with a clean pile, then that becomes the pile where everyone dresses from... Motherhood.



**Remember to submit your own humor parenting quotes, either by commenting or hashtagging #thehappydayshumor 

Until summer...

The snow is falling outside the window and our heat is turning on every few minutes. Winter is still vibrant in the outside world. But inside, my daughter is sitting on the floor in front of our record player with a handful of vintage records sprawled over her lap and my son is twirling around to the music... The warmth of this scene will keep me comforted and content until summer arrives.

Mid Week Humor: Humor challenge!

I've thought about this long and hard. I was trying to figure out a way to have a weekly challenge to engage more conversations on my blog. So after much consideration, I've decided that I'm going to start a weekly mid week humor challenge. Each Wednesday, I'll submit something humorous or silly that has happened in my parenting world. Then, you all could join in on the conversation by adding your own humor stories to the comment section on the original post over on my blog. Or, you could hashtag it with #thehappydayshumor on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter (be sure to follow me on those sites as well to continue the conversation -you can follow me on those sites by clicking the appropriate icons in the right side column of my blog's page). Maybe, even add a photo and the hashtag... Humor is one of my main crutches with being a mom and I'm excited to hear all your relatable experiences too. This way, we can all laugh at the joys of parenthood together...

To start, here's my Mid Week Humor Post...

After my son sang about 3 nursery rhyme songs, back to back, I pushed my luck by asking for one more. He then replied, "ugh! I can't right now momma, because my legs are sooooo tired. I need to take a break." Not his voice, but his legs were tired... Children say the darndest things.

*Now add yours to the comment section...

Cold April day

I step out my door and feel the warm sunshine on my face and expect the air to be warm. Instead, I lose my breath as the 20 degree temperatures enter my lungs. My children run past me, eager to play in their sand that they scattered all over my pavement. Freezing temperatures never seem to phase children the way adults are affected. They find that their water table is frozen solid and they try everything to crack the ice. My daughter runs over to our forsythia bush to pick some more flowers for her bedroom. Her past ones are still vibrant, but most of the petals have fallen off and the floor is laden with small curled yellow flowers. About a quarter of the bush hasn't bloomed yet and with all the frost we've been having, I doubt it will flower this season. My son shrieks when he sees that our day Lily green sprouts are toppled over, then he grabs some leaves and tries to bury it to help the little plant warm up.

Yes, the sunshine is beautiful and yearned for, but we're craving warm outdoor air. Air that we could breathe all day and cleanse the indoor stale air that lingers deep in our lungs... For now, we'll pick those brightly colored flowers and place them in vases throughout our house, pretending summer is here, and imagine all the fun that is waiting for us in the outside world.

Silly April days

Mother nature can't seem to decide what season we're supposed to be in. It was just yesterday that I was outside with my children, basking in the warm air, going on adventures and picking brightly colored forsythia's for our home. But today, our outside is blanketed with fresh powdery snow. 

My children and I hiked through our back woods. My daughter wanted to play "mystery" and she and her brother had to find clues throughout the forest. My son picked up every small detail that his little feet stumbled upon and said, "look momma! Here's a clue!" My daughter was more imaginative and thought up a scenario that the silly Leprechauns have hidden items for them to find. The already found ones were in a bag that was slung over my shoulder. 

We played and walked as we ventured further and further into the depths of the woods. My daughter took a break and sat on a old downed oak tree. She shimmied her small frame up onto the thick trunk and I sat down beside her. My son was in front of us, kicking leaves around with his feet, trying to find a lost pine cone. My daughter and I talked about what other things the Leprechauns would be leaving in the woods. I said I wasn't sure, but we could continue to search. She replied that she wanted to leave the items behind for another day. She didn't want to find everything and be bored the next time we came back. 

After helping my son find that lost pine cone, I placed the last found items into my carrying case and we headed back out. I walked in between my son and daughter, with our hands tightly intertwined together. We sang some Alvin and the Chipmunk songs as we maneuvered our way over the rocks and under the fallen branches. My daughter sings right on key and always remembers all the correct words, I'm sure she'll do something beautiful with her voice one day. While, my son sings out of key, hums some parts, and adds a few extra words to the song -He inherited those lovely skills from his momma. 

So, with our snow covered grounds and frigid temperatures, today was a lazy day. One of those days where time doesn't click as fast as it normally does and you spend more time talking about the day, instead of participating. But, by the end of it, the snow was patchy with tall grass poking through. Brown branches were now speckled with white. And, the wind was blowing harder and the air was getting colder. 

Nevertheless, remembering our adventures searching for hidden Leprechaun treasures is what kept me warm inside. I hope my daughter and son never lose their imagination and always try to find the fun in everything they do. I hope they continue to always seek adventure and never let grass grow under their feet... So even though today was a lazy snowy day, we still had the fun carried over from our outdoor adventure. And in a few short weeks, the snow will be packed away for the season and more beautiful forsythias and other various flowers will color in the brown tones that were somber during our winter days.    

Temporarily unplugged from the cyber world

I'm sorry for vanishing this past week or so. I unintentionally "unplugged" myself from my computer and phone. It seemed that engaging in the present moments with my family just got away from me. However, I didn't do it as a righteous act or as a lent objective. I just simply didn't get around to using technology. That sounds pretty bizarre in a world where technology is just as important as breathing. 

Currently, I have four blog posts half written and patiently waiting in my drafts. One is about recess and an incident that has happened, one about my husband and him being away, another one is about my flusters of motherhood, and a final one about my children and their differences with learning.

With each one, I eagerly sat down at my computer and flushed out thoughts on each subject. But lately, I've been a bit of a scatter brain and forty million thoughts are running through my mind at any given second. So after a few dozen lines or so, I hit a block. Then as life has it, I was pulled away from my writers block and just didn't return.

The past week or so have been spent running around during the holiday madness, spending loving time with family and just being with my children over spring break. My daughter has been having more contention with recess and visually upset more. My son appears to be mulling through the terrible 3s, which is a lot to handle, especially since I never experienced this with my daughter. I have been taking time to talk with them and focus all my attention on them and not sporadically viewing my phone intermittently. Also, when my children show any type of behavior issue, I take that as a cue that I need adjust something in my parenting world. Hence, some of my evenings were spent being alone and objective and pulling out my old behavior modification knowledge from deep inside my brain.

So, by the end of the night, when my children were asleep, instead of blogging, I have also been spending uninterrupted time with my husband -watching our beloved DVR shows. Something I have taken for granted since having children.

This time away has also been more of a reflection of things I want to either change or tend to more. I found with the winter days, I spent more time scrolling through my news feed, than participating with tasks in front of me. And spending more one on one time with my husband is moving higher and higher up the list --Maybe that's another blog post too?

I love blogging and I relish this space to jot down my thoughts to have forever stored in the cyber world. However, every once in a while, it does feel good to unplug from it and eliminate all the time restrictions. And I know with the warmer days approaching, I'll spend less and less time unconsciously viewing news feeds and more time breathing in the beautiful moments around me. Annnnd, blogging quietly in the still night. So hopefully over the next week, I'll get to finishing those four stories and you'll all be able to share the experience with me...

...Until then, enjoy your Happy Days!

**And thank you all who commented, asking how I was, or if everything was ok. I greatly appreciate that you all enjoy hearing my stories and have personally made a connection. I'll get those four stories out the quickest I can and I cannot wait to converse about them with you all. Remember, pass my blog onto a friend and maybe they can relate to something I have written as well. Feel free to share some of your favorite stories, but remember to tag and provide a direct link back to The Happy Days. Also, you can join my blog's site or any of my social media sites by going to my blog's main page and finding all the options in the right side column. Thank you again for your continued support!**